When Life Gives U Lemons....

Hey Everyone...
Its Christmas.. and the end of 08.. I have a lot of things to be thankful for.. My life aint too bad.. i still have a job.. Im making more money this year than I was at this time last year.. Ive gotten close to a lot of people that I wanted too.. IM STILL ALIVE.. Ive been able to spend all my hoidays with now 82 year old grandpa... man I love him.. he just said "Its almost the new year, and I aint got rich yet".. aint he speakin for all of us??
man.. niggas need money...
With all the good things going on.. theres always things that try to test my faith... Like for example.. you know a nigga like me is always on the computer.. if I aint working.. Im reseaching something on the computer.. and now.. my computer dont wanna do past the start up screen.. whenever I start it up.. It cuts right back off... Aint that a bitch?!?!?

So let me put you in perspective on how much my computer is important to me and my life..

My computer is LOADED with music... Last time I checked my iTunes.. it said I had 23 Days worth of music... and thats without all of my mixes.. Im well over 100 mixes now.. esp since lately, ive mixed two radio shows.. My bobby vaentino mix, my Mary J Blige Mix and a few other mixes in the past month... So Im praying that its not my hard drive.. Ive just been leavin it alone and lettin it rest lately.. hopefully itll get back jumpin.. bc I need alllll of that music..

But even if it doesnt work.. i wont trip.. ive been praying.. I been talkint o God.. this might be his way of telling me that I need to fiend for HIM as much as I fiend for this music.. Im sure he understands a lil bit, bc He is the one that made me how I am.. he knows how addicted to the music I am.. So im prayin for a good ending to this story...

I just pray that people dont trip on the little things esp in 09.. little things will keep u away from big things.. you can be soo hung up on some bullshit and mess up you chance for the better things...

So I pray that everyone has a lot of lemonade in 09

Sooooo... I had the whole "13 Question" thing a few weeks ago.. and the last set came late.. so i thought I would still at least post them...
and heres what she wrote...


sorry...we just never got up on AIM. but here are your 13..

1.what made you start mixing?
Man.. I been wantin to mix as long as i could remember.. i used to played two tapes at the same time to make songs mix.. but now since I have a real way to do it, I mix.. and I mix alll the time..

2.where's the one place in the world you want to visit most?
Brazil... def for the ladies, food and overall culture..

3. where was your favorite place to hang out at in high school?
Over my friend Crystals house.. her and my cousin used to smoke weed and be blowed as fuck.. and I would just laugh and joke with them all night... I never smoked with them tho..

4. why do you love Alicia Keys so much? ((besides her obvious good looks!))
I mean, its mostly bc of her looks.. but besides that.. she smart as hell.. i watch her interviews.. I love how she speaks.. and carries herself.. she is the shit to me.. and she dummy thick...

5. If you could get your neice && god daughter anything what would it be?
I would love to give them a paid for college education.. and a coupla pair of fresh ass jordans..

6. if you could have a super power it would be...?
Teleport.. traveling takes more time than I want it to.. if i could have a second one.. it would def be to be invisible

7. what impresses you the most?
self confidnce, and unique-ness.. the ability to open my eyes to something i wouldnt have noticed

8. if you went to school again for something what would it be?
Computer graphics or web design

9. what's your dream car?
I really dont know.. I guess whatever car makes my "pussy rate" go up.. haaa

10. if you ever have a son would you consider naming him Darrell no middle name the III?
never.. well cant say never.. but no..

11. when we go a bar what should I expect you to order?
Goose.. maybe a long island if i tryna get fucked up quick..

12. do you have a favorite year?
07.. def

13. what song are you thinking about? ((cuz I know you have one in your head))
Bobby Valentino - Cant Wait Til Later... Everytime i think of summer of 07.. i hear Bobby V's cd..

Thanks boo.. hope u were informed..

Musiq - OnMyRadio Review

I felt strongly about this cd.. so i felt I had to blog about this..
take this trip in my mind..
Im gonna talk about some people.. not directly.. but u might know if Im at your door..and also.. u might hear me knockin.. but i aint really talking about you... its just my thoughts, manifested...




1 Backagain -
This song seems to be about a relationship, that was over.. and been over.. and then outta no where.. the other party wants to come back and talk about things and work things out.. For us normal people.. aint that some shit when someone you are completely over.. comes back or at least tries too.. confusing right?? Youve got urself past the period of questioning urslef on the situation.. then.. BOOM.. more unceertainty.. more questions... should I jump back in the poool that almost drowned me once before?? Should I jump back in the pool that left me high and dry??

2 Until
I love this song.. the beats nice.. the "J'Adore" perfume commercial sample is hot.. i love the length of time he describes that his love will last.. we all have someone who we know that we will love forever.. no matter who else comes in our lives after.. I know I have a few of those.. he did is thing on this one...

3 IfULeave

I didnt really listen to this song when it first hit the radio.. but after further review.. its a good, well written song.. this nigga Musiq be saying what I be thinking forreal.. He is speakin on my side of relationships that Ive had that were cut short... some many times gurls have gotten so upset over tryna get through my hardheadness.. and please believe, im hardheaded and stubborn.. but i change with time.. on my time.. I feel you tho.. I know that we are on two different clocks.. and I cant help it.. so if you feel that you will do best without me.. I gotta let you do you.. but im doing me.. and that what the issues are.. no love lost.. I do understand.. you dont understand how many times Ive gone through it.. If i put u through it.. raise your hand...

4 deserveUmore

This is a selfish song.. and i fuckin feel it.. sometimes you just want to be on that... "who deserves you more than me??" that how I feel.. sometimes after all the time and feelings uve invested.. all the molding and everything that comes with that, u dont want someone to reap all of your hard work you sowed for years.. I deserve that.. and ima fight for that shit.. thats no one who deserves you more..

5 Special
Nice song.. nice lyrics.. not one of my personal favorites on the album.. but still a good song.. for some reason I feel like this song needed like Q-Tip or Rapheal Saadiq on it.. feel me tho?? I like the line.. "you and me look good together".. do u all think about this as much as I do?? I look at how I look with someone either in a pic or a mirror.. and i imagine how we are seen.. I think I would look good with a few people.. but it would have to be someone "special"

6 Dearjohn

Really nice song.. I love how it starts with the gurl talkin and getting ready.. that she notices the "Dear John" letter.. such and sad song.. sung so well.. this shit sounds great.. i would love to hear this live.. I saw him live this past summer while he was sick.. and he still sounded great.. back to the song.. he speaks on how he just knows its time to keep it moving and no time to look back... how would you feel if you happen to find this in the middle of you regular day.. your regular work week.. or on your way to the gym or to pick up the kids.. that will mess a niggas day up forreal.. he gets right to the point.. and says goodbye.. the songs ends with her on his voice mail.. great song.. great story ::message erased::

7 Loveofmylife

Sounds great when it open.. nice live band sound.. the song isnt your traditional "love of my life" song.. this is from the point of after things arent good.. this is after the "reflection" period.. after you get your heads out the cloud and get back grounded.. when u see that somethings are so important with out the one with you.. without the one to share it with... what do you do when u lost love and then u notice that what u lost is what u wanted?? do you humbly try to come back.. or do you take a different approach?? are you apologetic? do u ever feel as if you deserve a second chance?? how do u show someone that they are the love of your life?? how can they take you serious after what happened in the past??
Rhetorical right?? well these are my questions when listening.. the song is beautiful.. then it mixes right into one of my other favorites on the cd..

8 Moneyright

This is something that EVERY real nigga will relate too.. its in my nature to want to take care of the one who I want.. i wanna take them out.. i wanna stay in with them.. i wanna buy stuff for them.. i wanna go shoppin.. but i gotta get my money right first.. I got it in my heart.. just not in my pocket just yet.. feel me?? how much is worth that I want to do it.. but I just dont have the means for it?? I love it when the gurl understands that Ima do what I can... and respect me even when me money might run out.. one who knows that on an "off pay week".. we might just sit in the house and watch a few movies.. but that thursday after I get paid, we goin to the movies babe, and u can get that big bucket of popcorn and that red and blue icee that Ima drive half of.. I promise..

9 Someone

You know he had to hit us with the power ballad that we would expect from him, well this is it.. this the song that you zone out... or at least I do.. we is speakin my words.. he talks about how he wants someone who doesnt want him bc of who he is.. but for what he is.. someone who is self confident and has confindce in her lover.. a strong friendship.. someone who trust, believes, wants to be lead but can take control, and will build her man up.. gotdammit if that aint a real woman, then I dont kno what is.. I pray God is making this gurl for me.. cuz im being so picky til I see it.. we always have someone in our mind who we would love to be this someone.. someone who we would just wish would flip the switch in their brain to see how "meant to be" you and them are.. til then, should we keep it moving and stick it out? How do u know which one is your someone? I wish my "someone" could see me, my intentions, potential and love. Man, this song is so strong.. this some ol wedding reception, slow dance song.. dont catch me on the floor on this one.. i might sing to you.. can you picture me with someone?? yes, me. The forever single guy. How do you picture my "someone"??

10 Iwannabe

I thought this was weird to be following "someone" but its still hot.. this seem like a Carl Thomas song.. the feel of it.. the sound and everything.. like you on a island with some breezy ass cream linen pants on with a coconut drink or something.. the words are really nice tho.. very poetic to me..

11 sobeautiful

This is another one of those songs.. he aint just got one on the CD.. this is one of those like "someone".. this to me is like a valentines day song... you telling her how beautiful she is.. and how she is the best thing to happen to you in your life.. it sounds a lil different bc of the tone he is singing it.. but its a nice change up.. i feel that this should be played for your gurl everyday.. i feel that in a healthy relationship.. she should know that your still attracted to her everyday you see her.. she should know it without u even sayin.. she should see it in your eyes.. look at her like you want her..

12 Radio

We all know this.. this nothing like the rest of the cd.. not that that is bad.. but i like the finished product..

I looooooooooooooooooove this cd...
on constant repeat my niggas...

Pussy Rate

Growing up as a black male.. your peers always tell you ways to make your "pussy rate" go up... I will try to define "pussy rate" as much as I can

Pussy Rate - Noun - an imaginary chart that calculates how much vagina you can get that changes when u acquire certain qualities, items, history or any other factors that will make you more or less attractive to the female gender to make her want or not to want to give you the pussy..

Some tanglie factors that we as men believe that can make our pussy rate go up are:
Money
Clothes
Cars
Muscles
Tattoos
Houses
Cologne



Niggas do the things that niggas do.. just to get more pussy.. Sorry for using such a strong word to some but it gets the point across..
If we could get the chick that we wanted, while being broke, never needed no money, no cars or job.. we wouldnt do shit..

Ladies.. think of a man that u like..
Picture him in your head..
you see the last thing he wore when he saw you? or maybe what did he wear the 1st time yall went together somewhere? how did he smell? when yall went some where.. did u pay? How is his place? is it comfortable? how does the bed feel?? how is his hair when u see him?

All of these things.. we know yall pay attention too.. so we try to do all the right things to make the rate go up..

All our lives we are taught how to act, what to say, how to walk, and everything to make us be attractive to the one that we want.. when is it too much??

I mean damn... do i have to do allll this shit just for someone to like me? The thing that got me thinkin like this is when I was lookin thru some of the adds in the newspaper with one of my older niggas.. and we was lookin at the home theatre section.. he was like..

"Nigga.. you need your house laidout like this.. get you the 54" flatscreen.. get you some suede couches.. bose surround sound.. get your computer shit all upgraded.. some nice ass lamps.. and table with some nice shit on it.. and BAM! your rate is through the roof"

Im like damn.. i gotta do all of this.. just to get some?

People know that that aint even my goal.. I aint never just seeked out pussy.. as corny as it sounds.... I look for strong friendship that leads to that.. courtship.. stuff like that.. I like watching movies with a chick.. cooking and eating.. face to face conversations.. getting drunk.. laying with females who I like.. these are things that I want to happen BEFORE the act happens.. if the act happens before.. it kinda messes things up in my head.. but thats another blog...

I have always sort of been "anti pussy" rate on somethings.. I never wanted a really nice car bc i never wanted the reason why someone liked me was bc of my car.. I dont really like it when gurls just know me as DJDURL bc i dont like groupies.. I dont wear jewelry bc it bring the wrong attention.. The things that I do do tho are make sure my hair and shoes are clean when u see me.. maye i might smell good so that u remember it when u hug me.. I might even hug u a lil longer if i aint seen u in a minute.. cuz u like that..

but to me.. those are just factors of me.. I love shoes.. so i do it for me too.. and i gotta feel clean.. so I gotta keep me hair nice.. and if u knew me when I had braids.. you would never see me with my fro out.. I always had some fresh ass braids..

also.. if you knew me.. I aint never had a car that was just the SHIT.. me cutlass back in the day was jumpin.. but it got the wrong attention.. and it got broke into too much..so I always said fuck it..

Ive always had the inside pressure to lose weight bc gurls never want a fat dude.. their fantasy guys are TI, Chris Brown, Ludacris, Lloyd, Trey Songz blah blah blah.. I dont look like that.. and im cool with that.. we all cant look alike.. but Im sure, that mentally.. I can be attractive. I want someone to like me for anyways.. and thats the really thing I ever said..

I want you to remember how I make you feel when I leave you more than remember how I look when Im with you..

I want to be the one who makes you happy and smile.. the one who makes you laugh.. the one who listens and doesnt talk about himself so much.. the one who doesnt constantly look in the mirror at hisself.. not the one who is in the mirror more than you.. I want you to be the pretty one.. just let me be the fresh one... cool??

Is it arrogance to not want to be like every other nigga?? Do I act too good bc I dont feel like i gotta do certain things and I WONT do certain things just to get someone to like me or let me fuck? I dont wanna go thru hoops and change everything about DARRELL, just to get you.. I wanna be ME with YOU.. will you let me be that or do I gotta be him??

What u Think???



PS.. I would love to remake these pix... they sexy right???

Every Word in This Blog is Gonna Be About U!!!

I wrote this in 2006 on my myspace blog.. and it still makes sense.. so i copied and pasted for those who havent read it..

"YOU"

So... 2006 has been a hell of a year so far... and it aint over...all of the memories of this year would be a great movie... think of where you were last year this time... think of the love that has turned to hate.. and the strangers that have turned into friends.. and old friends that have turned in to better friends... all of these things have happened for a reason...

Love yourself.. b/c you cant love no one unless you do... deal with your problems and ask for help sometimes... love those who love you back.. and when they show their love.. dont turn your back.. dont change...

You are a beautiful person.. inside and out.. and some see it.. but many overlook it... but keep growing... keep goin... one day that one person will open their eyes... Look in the mirror and love what ur lookin at... someone else out there does... so why dont you??

Think of who you were around this time last year.. and see what u have learned in the past 365... things aint always what they seem... but dont let that hold you back... dont let what one person has done to you keep you from someone who will right all the wrongs...

Love yourself and fulfill your goals.. finish what u have started.. use your talents and do what u love... finish school... get a job you actually like.. get money.. hang around postitive people who are movin forward and love those who have shown love back...

You are not alone... look at all the people who tihnk highly of you... give them a chance... open up... say what you feel... and mean what u say... sometimes conflict will come but you live and you learn... you gettin older now... so you are learning a lot... your on your own.. no one to fall back on.. and your makin it.. and you still got your family... and your loved ones... so be happy.. and learn something everyday... and if they dont notice how special you are... FUCK EM.. haha...

Love, Yourself